Being Sick

You heard it here first: getting sick royally blows.

No, no, bear with me.  All that excitement you feel at the idea of a sore throat, hacking cough, a nose that goes from plugged tighter than the vacuum seal on the goddamn International Space Station to a sudden pouring rush like the freaking Niagara?  See, it actually isn’t all fun and games and getting off of work and sleeping like a cold remedy commercial.  It actually really really sucks.  It’s nothing like you see on TV.

Totally blows.

Anyway, I’m close to feeling back to normal.  I got sick during the friggin’ New Years’ Eve Party – fever, sore throat – and couldn’t figure out what the hell was happening (due to some alcohol consumption).  The next day when I was pretty much immobilized I figured it out.  It’s taken until now to get close to normal.  Still waking up with a clogged nose for some reason, along with an irritatingly sporadic cough, but nearly there.  It’s about friggin’ time.

So the next time someone tries to high-five you over being sick, punch them in the sternum, very hard.

About Alan Edwards

Cancer caregiver, writer, accountant, gamer, poolboy, and dispenser of terrible advice that should never under any circumstances be followed.

Posted on January 11, 2011, in Rantin' and Bitchin' and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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